Today’s Journal (Giving Up) – 03 December 2024

It has been a while since I wrote to you. I had a terrible and good year. God is good and He has been in every day as I faced some of the worst challenges and still do.

What can we say about challenges. Paul said we must rejoice in tribulation because our faith grows when we face difficult challenges and our relationship with God gets stronger.

In my case it was the opposite. My challenges did not pull me closer but instead pushed me back to my default. Fight.

For the first time hatred filled me as I watch one more time how unfair manipulation gets rewarded, and I simply stand powerless to it.

Everything in live happens with a purpose. We do not always understand when things are removed from our lives or when things cross our path. God will never test you beyond your abilities and believe me I got close to the point where I thought God had a different person in mind.

Yet here I am. Jesus said that His grace is enough. The problem here is not the grace part but what we know of God’s grace. When Jesus said this, He knew that God’s grace is limitless and greater than what we can understand or comprehend.

Put your challenge in God’s hands and trust. Yes, trust Him completely with a humble desperate heart. He will take control, and He will change the outcome. Most importantly, it will be for His glory and not our own ego.

When God moves and things change. Lives are touched and people change. Remember that.

Leave it to God and trust Him.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

The truth about forgiveness

What is forgiveness? Oxford says it is the action or process of forgiving or being forgiven. But what is forgiveness actually? It is the release of the grip of offence taken or given that directly touches rejection and insecurity.

Jesus said in Matthew 6, For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

Paul wrote to the Ephesians, be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

In Luke 6 we read, do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

Forgiveness is not just letting go but in essence it is releasing yourself, your soul, and your mind from hurtful bondage. Unforgiveness and holding on to a grudge is merely putting shackles around your life stealing the kingdom of God from you.

Forgiveness is not just a word that we randomly speak to make people happy, it is the sword of release in a world where our downfall is imminent and expected. Around you are millions of souls in bondage because of a broken environment due to sin. Our downfall is when we allow our sinful nature to be our compass in every decision and in every action.

Jesus displayed the true nature of forgiveness in love when He hanged on the cross and forgave the man hanging next to Him. He spoke over the crowd that wanted His end and asked the Father to forgive them. Both these acts of forgiveness He did while in immense pain. The creator of heaven and earth hanged on a cross where He was put by the very people He created and yet He only desired freedom for them and finally He died and rose from the dead defeating that same sin so that those who hated Him can also have forgiveness.

The truth about forgiveness is not merely the words that we speak, but the entire release of a burden driven soul and letting go of offences that brings nothing more than pain and regret and unwarranted sorrow. The act of forgiving breaks the bondage that the enemy has over you and free you from the lies that kept you captive.

The victory in forgiveness is breaking the silence of a need to live free and opening your heart to the full blessing that lies in the kingdom of heaven. Allowing Jesus to free you and to bring a new dimension in your relationship with God. Forgiveness not only sets you free, but it heals. When your heart is pure and your need for redemption is true, then the Father will heal you from your pain and break the chains that the enemy has on you.

It is a life changer and life giver.

Today’s Journal (Anything) – 19 September 2023

Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?”

We are busy with a series on “Anything can happen” in our church and to be honest I am a firm believer in anything can happen, because with God all things are possible. Peter walked out on the water and as soon as he saw the waves caused by the storm on the ocean he started to sink.

Jesus grabbed him, but what He said is something that I want to emphasize. Jesus said, “Why did you doubt me?”. Does this sound familiar? I find myself in this exact spot so many times and when I am in the middle of the storm, I get overwhelmed, and I lose the fight. Jesus makes it abundantly clear that by faith Peter would have been fine because his trust would have been firm in the Lord.

Why do we doubt? I think it is in some instances that we seek a quick fix and when it does not happen at the time we wanted, we lose faith, and we drown. Luckily the Lord is always with us, and He pulls us out of our own pit, but what if we kept the faith, kept trusting and allowed Him to act on His time. Then my friend the reward is not in the Lord taking us through the storm, but the reward is the way our faith gets stronger.

God will always be with us, but we must follow His word and allow Him to do the work on His perfect time. The result of this is a much larger blessing in more ways than we can imagine and our relationship with our Father grows.

Although I know He can do all and can change all and save us from everything, I will always keep my hope in Him even when He does not change my situation on my time or at all. I know He can speak the word, and everything can change, yet I will remain steadfast in my faith until God steps in and changes it.

Do not lose faith or hope, because Jesus wants you to trust Him and keep your eyes on Him throughout the storms in your life.

Have a great day.

Today’s Journal (Me) – 14 September 2023

And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it (Romans 7).

I read this chapter and to be honest it just opened to me. We live everyday trying to do the right thing and I find myself completely missing the objective and ending up doing it wrong. I am constantly in a battle, and it seems as if the enemy just took up a new level of attack on me. I am currently battling with two autoimmune diseases and the words in proverbs 23 (For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he) just opened my eyes yesterday.

I realised that one of my biggest challenges is the “Not enough” challenge. I am not a good enough father, I am not providing enough, I am not good enough, I am not strong enough, I am not supporting enough, and I am not working hard enough. These words steel from us and it allows the enemy a gap into our spiritual world. An autoimmune disease is the body’s immune system turning against itself and attacking the body. This unnatural behaviour is caused by the spirit of infirmity (weakness) changing your body’s natural way into the opposite, thus making it attack itself.

To be honest I rebel against God in this way because He gave His son to break sin, yet I allow sin to control my life just a Paul explains in Romans 7. It is not me that is doing it wrong but my sinful nature that is in charge. This area is opened because I allow the lies of the enemy to be my reality. Defeating this spirit is a journey, yet one we must overcome and defeat.

My dear friend, do not allow the words of the enemy to alter who God intended you to be. Remember that the enemy uses your mind as well as the words of other to manifest in you thus allowing the spirit of infirmity to do its job. You are made in the image of God and not in the image of this world. This world and all its lies cannot define who you are when you are in God and He is in you.

Start by loving yourself. You cannot love other if you do not love yourself. If you believe all the lies the enemy cast, speaks, and throws over your life than you are in rebellion with what God intended. Turn away from the lies and start working on your relationship with your Father God. That is what He made you for and with that in place the hold of the enemy will lessen, and your victories will increase.

You are so loved. Have an awesome day.

Today’s Journal (Impossible) – 30 Augustus 2023

I think personally I am probably the worst example of how to be a Christian ever. My entire life is a roller-coaster ride from one obstacle to the next and from one mistake to the other. I think my biggest problem ever was content and understanding love as Jesus showed.

Content basically summarised as not excepting circumstances as they were or a simple life. I needed to be the best and needed to drive the car I wanted, and I needed to be accepted the way I was. There was no place for someone else’s needs except my kids and surely no place for disagreement.

Obstacles I have plenty and challenges even more. I think stupidity and ignorance probably played a huge role and then there is me having to prove a thing or two.

Jesus gave one commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you (John 15).

Paul goes a bit further and explains love (kindness) in a broader way in Corinthians 13. The essence of love is love like Jesus loves. That unconditional intense love that will give more than what is expected. Jesus gave His life, yet He could have called the armies of heaven at any time and free himself from this burden. His example in just that one act displays a love that sees a bigger picture and larger effect than what a normal eye in any situation can see.

Love should always overcome all and any unwanted or unnecessary reactions. I am completely useless as this. If it feels unfair in any way I am up in arms and a lot have changed in my life, yet I find myself always in a battle against unfairness.

To love like Jesus did it means that you should also love your enemies and most importantly pray for them. Help them and accept nothing in return. You must love your neighbour and you must be willing to give your life for a complete stranger.

Tough call, yes. Doable, well I leave that thought to you. From my side I need to look at myself and the way I react to remarks, anger, unfairness, and mistakes. I must understand better and give more of me (myself).

The battle from here is one that can be won, and the victory will probably save a life, but more important it will affect people around me. That is the essence of Jesus’s final task – tell the world the good news. You can not tell good news if you are always angry, upset, or depressed. These are issues in our lives that can be defeated by ignoring the lies of the enemy and accepting the truth in Jesus Christ.

In essence I need to be more like my Father and less like me.

Have a great day.

Today’s Journal (Emptiness) – 22 Augustus 2023

I find myself in probably in one of the most challenging times in my life and I am struggling to understand what God wants from this. My budget is so depleted at the moment that to make my month I have to walk to work. Today was my first walk and I tell you it is much further than it looks plus I totally miscalculated the time to walk the distance so I was late for work.

Then to add to my mishap I am so tired today and my knees are so sore. I am sitting here contemplating how am I going to keep this up. On my walk this morning the Holy Spirit kept putting these words into my head: For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. 

This is Paul and I have to give you the full context of it because you will be so surprised when you hear the rest of my testimony.

How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Even so, you have done well to share with me in my present difficulty (Philippians 4:10-14).

Paul writes here to say thank you to the church in Philippi for their help and concern and he mentions how he has learned to be content with what he has. He goes on to say how he learned the secret to live with almost nothing or with everything and then he says that you can do everything through Christ who gives us strength.

In the midst of my crises, I get a phone call and someone I least expected called and said they will help me until I am back on my feet again. How amazing is our God and how great is his faithfulness.

My dear friend, do not stop fighting and do not stop praising. This was Paul and in the midst of his tribulations he praised God. He lived with almost nothing and still praised God. Do not stop to speak to God and to spend your time in prayer. Do not stop to give thanks and do not give up. It will change and it will get better.

Have a great day.

Today’s Journal (Fruit) – 15 Augustus 2023

Anger is ultimately a happiness thief. Paul wrote in Galatians that anger and outbursts of anger are the type of things that can keep you from inheriting the kingdom of heaven. He goes on to say that love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control are the fruit that the Holy Spirit produces in our lives and ultimately these are the qualities that not only gets you to inherit the kingdom of heaven, but it will produce far more victories in your life than you could ever imagine.

The enemy is cunning, and he knows what will keep you from God’s promises and anger, jealousy and envy are tools that he uses easily, specifically if you are vulnerable in these areas.

Personally, I believe that these reactions have root causes that is deeply imbedded in your mind. Maybe someone said something to you in your childhood that is a trigger point that immediately makes you angry when you hear it of see it or however it occurred.

When these bad fruits seem to have an unbreakable grip on you, you need to ask God to help you identify the root of this behaviour. Once you realise what causes this it is actually quite easy to destroy.

For example, I had an issue with a word that was said to me when I was a child and the feeling of worthlessness that was caused in my childhood flared up when it is spoken even if not directed at me. I got upset and I would be angry on the spot.

Identifying the event in my childhood and the person and then releasing it broke the grip the enemy had with this. In fact, I not only forgave but prayed prosperity over this person which is directly in contrast to what the enemy wants. The result, freedom from the world and the lies the enemy tells.

In essence you are never what the enemy wants you to think of yourself, in fact you are a creation of the Almighty God and He made you perfect in every way, regardless of your so-called flaws.

I am not perfect, and I make mistakes every day, but I will not allow the enemy to use words from another person to create an altered image of who God wants me to be. Every day I learn from God and implement His word into my life. This to me will be a lifelong journey, but most importantly I seek God first before I allow the world to dominate my thoughts.

My prayer for you is that you will truly see yourself as God sees you and know that you are loved regardless of your mistakes and what you think of yourself. Allow the Holy Spirit to be your guide and to be the only influence in your thoughts and decisions.