Dear Jo and Donovan,
I contemplated about writing this email the past few days
and then decided I will do it anyway. You see by now more than one person spoke
to me and confirming when your affair started. Funny thing is they place it
earlier than what I thought. So, Jo you can stop with the lies and the act.
There are actually people that saw you they just could not keep quiet anymore.
Now, Donovan I would love to meet you and believe me it will
not be a social call. I am going to put you in a wheelchair. I know it is not
my place to judge and yes, I do not know you, but if your intentions were honourable,
we would not be where we are. It is easy to prey on the weak and a wife that is
unhappy is an easy target. Believe me I know all the tricks, I made my mistakes
and still carry that burden. We find similar creatures in the wild and we call
them vultures. If you were a person of integrity, I would not hear about the
things you did behind my back. Funny thing is the whole company knows. I am the
only idiot that thought Jo was not like that.
Yes, Jo can try and justify her act by telling the world
about my affairs. But that is ok, because I told the entire world what I did on
my blog and repeatedly asking for forgiveness. You see I stood in front of her
family a few years back begging their forgiveness and pledging to never hurt Jo
again. And I did exactly that. Jo can try and talk that away by telling her
family that she is tired of fighting, but if you are the only one trying to
rebuild a home while the other one is doing everything to break it down, you
get frustrated. But what she neglects to tell all those eager to gossip friends
in sales is that I always went back and said I am sorry. She on the other hand,
not so much.
Donovan, you came into a house that I was trying to fix and
trying to rectify my mistakes. I love my kids and I would do anything for them.
You two may say that you care for them and that you only have good intentions,
but if that was true. We would not be here. You have to look those boys in the
eyes and know that you broke up a home. Jo said I did nothing wrong when she
left and that it was not me, but her. I know those words. That is what you say
when you have someone else.
She is right I did nothing wrong. I love her with all my
heart, and you took that heart and destroyed it. A heart that was under the
impression that it was forgiven. You can’t say you forgive and bring me back
into your life for a few years and then suddenly say you can’t forgive me. That
is cruel, but more so is it a scape coat of someone that is not willing to
fight for her children and home where they can be a family. That is all I
wanted is a family, but apparently, I am the only one that understands the word
in the end.
Jo would say she is unhappy, but I did everything for her. I
knew the burden she carried at work therefore I tried to make her burden at
home as light as possible. I wonder if she actually saw it. We make our own
happiness, but if you keep telling yourself you are unhappy and you do not talk
about it, then are you really unhappy or playing for time. She would say that
she had anxiety attacks. Well I never saw them. In fact, for someone with all
that stress she fell asleep most of the time before eight. I always talked to
her telling her about my days and all my challenges, because I love her, and
she was my best friend. She never told me what bothered her and when I asked
her why she never spoke to me and shared her concerns, she said she did not
know why. It is because she did not want to rebuild this home, she did not
care. Then again you have to look those little boys in the eyes every day
knowing you broke their home.
Finally, you cannot build something on lies. I know very
well. That is why I told Jo everything about my affairs so that I can rebuild
on truth. I have no place to judge you, Donovan nor you Jo. I know I have to
turn the other cheek. But if you wanted me to treat you just and fair, you
would not have walked into my house like a thief. I will end with this: I do
not care what you and Jo do, and I do not even care about the lies anymore. All
I care about is my kids. They are my life. So, stay away from them, because
what you are doing is wrong and I do not want my kids to see that. I know all
about the policies we have about this kind of conduct. I hope you do. We will
meet one of these days, Donovan and you will see my other side. I fact I will
open and close your eyes. Jo, I only hope that somewhere in your heart you can
feel and when you see my boys again that feeling will remind you that they need
a home more than anything. I have told you numerous times that anything is
possible and that I would still do anything for you. But I am a fool. In future
ask Donavan to fix your curtains and hang your pictures and Jo, get your own
medical aid.
Have an awesome day and I hope you are happy.
Cheers
PS: I am leaving this on my blog so that my son can read it
one day and know that his dad continued to hope his mom will come to her senses.
