A reminder for
today
Examine me, O
LORD, and prove me; try my reins and my heart. (Psalm 26:2)
Yesterday was a loss for me. Firstly, I was told to make a
change to my programs which meant I had to start from the beginning again. This
meant that I have officially started from scratch for the tenth time and by now
I was fed up. So, you can imagine I was not happy about it. Then we got a flat
tyre and I only saw this as the day ended. This meant I struggled to get the
spare wheel fitted when it was basically dark and I did not have much light to
go with. It is difficult when you struggle and suddenly you have that alone
feeling. I do not know if you have ever felt this. It is as if you are alone in
all your struggles and no one can understand it. You have no one to explain it
to and none that can help.
To add to this, I had to finish this change in my programs
and do the washing and the dishes and prepare my meals. By eleven I was exhausted
and irritated. I must have fallen asleep in second and when I woke this morning
I was still tired. Today is leg day for us and I suffered all the way through
it. So, how did I do in all my tests? I failed miserably. Once again, I am
trying to do it all. I do not trust God that my work will get done so I work
myself to my end. I do not think I need rest, yet I am exhausted. You see how
quickly we forget that God is the one we need and not the other way around.
Each day we face a number of tests and sometimes we pass,
but I fail most of the time. That is why I am writing only now, because I took
my car in so that they can repair the puncture and in the end, I bought a new
tire. More debt, more worries. The enemy is having a field day with me. I feel like
a sucker for punishment.
How do we overcome these continuous attacks? I need to
change my focus and my mind. I need to take all that I am and all that I face
and give it to the Lord. I need to understand that these tests are not to isolate
you, it there so that you can understand your dependency on God. It is there so
that you can learn that you are never alone and that you have all the strength
you need in Jesus. It is there to remind you that the Lord has overcome this
world and we do not need to do it again.
Lord, thank you for all that you do for us. Please guide us
and strengthen us through this day and lead us to those green pastures. Let us
live in your house for eternity and comfort us when we get that alone feeling. In
Jesus name.
Have an awesome day, dear friend of Jesus.
Cheers
